“Every parent’s nightmare” would be the evening news boilerplate description of “We Need to Talk About Kevin,” Lynne Ramsay’s disturbing movie about the mother of a child who goes on a killing spree at his high school. That trite phrase is accurate in an almost technical sense: Ms. Ramsay (who adapted Lionel Shriver’s novel with Rory Stewart Kinnear) follows a kind of dream logic in telling a chronologically splintered story, weaving patterns of associated images and sensations into an intense and claustrophobic web of fear..
A really cute counselor told me I wrote well, and so I kept writing to try to impress him. Now, it’s sort of my journal. I write totally free, and if I fall into a pattern, I haven’t been aware of it. It is my meditation and communion with my husband, Ernest. My interest in sex is unabated by all that I had: I always interested in it: watching it, doing it, helping others do it better, listening to others have it, lending a helping hand (quick, more lube!). Since it is a body based activity, the good that comes from it lasts and lasts and affects other parts of my life.
For example, in the first week or two of being with someone we might think we can grow to love them, but love takes both time and knowing a person to develop. While an “I love you” really soon might still feel good (though it can also feel scary or strange), chances are that’s happening too soon and someone saying it either doesn’t really mean it, isn’t recognizing that being in love isn’t the same as love, or might be trying, intentionally or not, to emotionally manipulate the other person. Moving things too fast can sometimes be about one or both people trying to artificially make a relationship solid before it actually is, or about people having fears that without moving really fast, someone will leave or reconsider.
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